<p>The Good Samaritan may soon be extinct in Thailand if the police response to a recent road traffic accident becomes the norm.</p> <p>It all started with a run of the mill hit-and-run. A tinted-window Mercedes (is there any other kind?) side-swiped a bicycle that was dutifully trundling along in the gutter, bringing down both rider and machine. Nothing life-threatening and the bike was damaged but repairable.</p> <p>Not that the Merc driver knew. He was long gone.</p>

<p>Stephen Hawking got to the Pearly Gates only to discover that entry control had been outsourced to a Thai company.</p> <p>The entrance to heaven had been transformed into an excessively curlicued arched gate as rococo as any you’ll find in a gated community in a Bangkok suburb, connected on either side to a nondescript wall adorned with razor wire, broken bottles and hastily scrubbed out graffiti of a black leopard’s head.</p>

<p><em>News item:</em></p> <p>National Security Council (NSC) secretary-general Wallop Raksanoh has “pledged to go after those who are financially supporting pro-election activists”.&nbsp; General Wallop pledged to “hunt down those who are the backers of the group,” saying that the “activists would not pose such a major problem if people were not egging them on.”</p> <p><em>The scene:&nbsp; A meeting room at the National Security Council, where the Egging On Investigation Team is reporting its findings.</em></p> <p>So, have you interrogated all the suspects?</p> <p>Yes, sir.&nbsp; 59 of them.</p>

<p>They are a staple of social media.</p> <p>The latest that I received warned against a ‘new’ scam when you check into a hotel.&nbsp; You’ve handed your credit card to the reception desk who take from it a deposit against which they will debit any extra charges for wildly overpriced miniature booze in the minibar or the laundry fee for your unmentionables.&nbsp; You get your card back and go to your room.</p>

<p>To judge from the cracks and potholes, the soi hasn’t been resurfaced in decades.&nbsp; Maybe not since the emergency makeover when a daily motorcade of Mercs began transporting royal offspring to the school nearby.</p>

<p>Pandemonium reigned in parliament yesterday after the vote to choose a new Prime Minister descended into farce.</p> <p>After the House had failed to choose a Prime Minister from among the candidates declared before the election, the appointed Senate was constitutionally required to join the House in voting for any candidate, including persons who had not stood for election.&nbsp; Predictably, the incumbent Prime Minister and leader of the 2014 coup d’état Gen Prayut Chan-o-cha was nominated.</p>